For this episode of Finding My User Manual, I sat down with Joy Brett, filmmaker, storyteller and the founder of Eureka Creative, a media agency dedicated to helping brands and thought leaders show up, level up and share their unique stories.

At the heart of her work is a deep belief in storytelling as a tool for connection. An award-winning director, Joy was recognised with the Mike Newell Award for directing at the Visions Film Festival 2023, as well as the Creative Entrepreneurship Award at the Flare Enterprise Awards 2024. Alongside running her business, she’s also completing a Masters in Global Film and Television.

But Joy’s work goes beyond storytelling on screen. She is also passionate about opening up conversations that are often left out of entrepreneurship, speaking candidly about living with borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety.

Here’s what she shared.

**CONTENT WARNING**

This episode contains conversation around difficult topics that some viewers/listeners may find distressing. Please read below for a more detailed description and to make an informed decision on whether this episode is for you. If not, please take gentle care of yourself and I look forward to re-connecting with you next week.

Specific subjects discussed include: Mental health, borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety, suicide, and brain fog.

If you’re affected by any of the topics discussed in this episode, you can find support via the following links:

UK: https://www.helplines.org/helplines/

Worldwide: https://www.helpguide.org/find-help

For Best Results, Place In An Environment With Animals

When asked what would be on page one of her user manual, Joy Brett said, “The first bit would definitely be, for best results, place in an environment with animals…I am bilingual and fluent in many animal languages.”

She’s also an empath. “If you’re feeling sad, I feel sad. If you’re feeling happy, I’ll feel happy. I pick up on things. I think it’s a bit like a sixth sense.”

Currently, she lives with Ruby, a Staffy mix dog, two cats, Dizzy, a ginger cat (who was rescued after being left in a box outside Pets at Home), and Binx, a black cat. Her pride and joy is a hamster called Riff Raff.

More Connection With Animals Than Humans

Has Joy Brett always felt that connection with animals? “Maybe more than humans.” She feels like even though you don’t speak the same language, you can read them more. She describes how they know exactly when you need them. “Quite often, if I’m low, my dog will come over, and she’ll be so well behaved in that moment. You can tell she’s trying to comfort you.”

What is it about animals that brings that calming presence? “I feel like it’s probably actually maybe the language barrier. Whether you’re having an argument with family, friends, or someone’s been complaining all day, it’s that quiet. I think that’s comforting. It’s like they’re there, but also they know if you don’t need them.”

The Guard Is Always Up

Joy Brett is always quite apprehensive with new people, especially if it’s a complete clean slate. “I think my quirkiness and all of that kind of gets put on the back foot to start with until I feel like there’s trust.”

Why is that guard up? “People can switch very quickly, and you don’t know what side of them you’re getting. I’ve had a lot of experiences with people that I’ve had one impression of them, and then it’s completely switched. So I don’t really know where I stand.”

She’d describe herself as an introvert. “But then if you’re in my really tight circle, you get exclusive access to my quirky side.”

Feeling Like An Outsider

Joy knows it’s the right time to show someone her full self if she feels like she has a shared experience, and someone can relate, which makes her feel like less of an outsider.  “I think that’s probably the big thing. I feel like an outsider in most situations.”

In terms of feeling like an outsider, what is maybe a misconception about her that people might think that she’d like to correct? “Just because we’re an outsider doesn’t mean that there isn’t something in common. Even if you just have one thing in common, I think that’s something to build on.”

Mental Health

Joy really noticed her mental health when she was a teenager, and when the anxiety started to kick in. “I think sort of towards the end of secondary school is when it peaked quite badly.”

She especially noticed it around the time some celebrities were speaking about it. The one that resonated with her was the Linkin Park lead singer, Chester Bennington, who lost his own battle with mental health. She posted about it on social media, talking about the loss. “People shouldn’t feel like they can’t talk about how they’re experiencing life in that moment.”

When discussing the response, Joy said, “I actually had people messaging me saying that, oh, it just makes them weak or it makes them selfish.”

Then, as she went through university and started to feel those sorts of feelings herself, some people who spoke to her said, “Oh, you’re just weak, you’re too emotional, you can’t cope.”

What did she think of that? “I thought, well, no, I can’t cope, but that doesn’t make me weak. That just makes me more sensitive to those sorts of feelings.”

“I think people that have experienced it do need to try and destigmatise it.”

Don’t Keep Everything Locked Away

Joy has tried lots of different types of therapy. From the cognitive behavioural therapy, she’s taken grounding exercises. “If I’m feeling the overwhelming anxiety, it’s things I can do with my hands as a distraction.”

One activity she does is listing five things you can see, four things you can hear, three things you can touch, two things you can taste, and one thing you can smell. “You can do it in different orders. If I’m with people and I can tell they’re feeling that way, I’m just like, okay, what’s five things you can see? And then we go through it again on repeat.”

From talking therapy, one thing really stuck with her. “You don’t have to keep everything locked in a wardrobe. You can take stuff out, unpack it, think about it, but put it back at the end of the day. You don’t have to keep thinking about it all the time.”

Brain Fog

What does brain fog feel like for someone who hasn’t experienced it?

“I mean, it’s literally, you could be having a conversation and then, in my head, I map out what I’m going to say. The sentence is already pre-made, and I’ve just got to read it. But then suddenly, the screen goes blank. And I’m like, I can’t remember what the word was. And it’s just gone.”

Sometimes when having a completely separate conversation, a thought from earlier will come back to her. “And I’m like, oh, that’s what I was going to say, but it’s not relevant anymore. It’s a really strange experience, but you just can’t do anything about it.”

Empathy is A Gift And A Burden

Is Joy’s ability to pick up on emotions a gift or a burden? “I think in the right hands, it’s kind of like a superhero thing. In the right hands, it’s for good. In the wrong hands, people take advantage.”

“It does feel like a burden, especially on those really tough days. But then again, I think I’m glad I was picked to be that way. If it was given to someone else, they might not treat people the right way.”

To deal with the empath overwhelm, she benefits from bouncing thoughts off of other people. How does she protect herself from empath overwhelm? “A lot of the time I’m like, OK, I have to fix it, and then I’ll sort of burn myself out in the process.”

Her mum is her go-to person to keep her balanced. While most of the time Joy can help, her mum reminds her sometimes, “You can’t help them. It’s not on you to do it. It’s not on you to fix it. There’s people around them that can help.”

Redefining Success

Has Joy’s experience with mental health redefined what success looks like for her?

She had an advanced idea of what job she wanted to do, and working the long hours associated with the job and the lack of a weekend, and the potential burnout that came with it, and the thought that “it’s fine because I’ll be in the industry that I love…it doesn’t matter because that’s the big dream.”

She remembers that those priorities shifted when she saw people around her experiencing that same burnout.

For Joy, it was about making a life that allows her to take that break when you’re not feeling right, alongside working with people who understand her. “I don’t have that big company pressure, where you feel like you’re a cog in a big machine and no one actually notices if you crack or if you don’t.”

She reflected on a birthday post recently that she’s not a six-figure business yet, but that’s something she can strive for. “I’ve built a life that works around my mental health and my family, and that’s more than I can ask for.”

Pause Before You Act

For anyone who relates to being an empath, Joy has learned to take a pause. “Sometimes I can get very frustrated very quickly, but I suppose that’s part of the bipolar and borderline personality disorder.”

Having that pause can make all the difference. “OK, this is how I’m feeling right in this second. Give it ten minutes and see how I feel then. And then if I feel like I still need to do something, maybe give it another 10 minutes and then think on that.” From there, she decides the next steps she is going to take.

It’s Not A Label, It’s A Diagnosis

For anyone with a similar page on their user manual, what would Joy want them to stop apologising for?

“If you’re not feeling well, you’re not feeling well. There’s no reason to apologise. If people don’t accept it, then they’re not your people. You’re allowed to have a bad day and not be criticised for it. Whether you’re physically ill or mentally ill, it’s the same thing. It’s an illness.”

When discussing the stigma of diagnosing mental health conditions, Joy said, “People are obsessed, they call it a ‘label’. And it’s like, no, it’s not a ‘label’. If someone had any other health condition, you would diagnose it. It’s a diagnosis. If someone broke their leg, you wouldn’t just let them walk around on a broken leg. It needs support and nurturing. So just support and nurture it. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

 

Listen to the full episode:

Connect with Joy Brett

Website: eurekacreative.co.uk

Instagram: @eureka_creative_ and @joysunscriptedthoughts

TIkTok: @eurekacreative and @joysunscriptedthoughts

YouTube: @EurekaCreative